"Look for the Helpers"

Today was definitely a yoga through tears kind of day. I walked in crying and I left crying, but somewhere in between, our incredible teacher, Natalie Skubic, reminded us to try to see the love and beauty all around us and try not to let the fear and sadness and horror take hold.

Natalie has this energy and spirit that will fill up the entire room and lift everyone in it. She came into class today and reminded us of the scene in American Beauty, where a plastic bag, literally a piece of trash, is filmed dancing in the wind, and the narrator says, “Sometimes there’s so much beauty in the world, I feel like I can’t take it.” A piece of trash, discarded, thrown away, but dancing there in the breeze, and it was so beautiful.

And so, this morning, in the face of more unfathomable news breaking our hearts, she commanded us all to say...

“Fuck this shit,” to the awful things that seem to keep happening, unfolding in more terrifying ways all the time. Fuck this shit, she said, and instead try to remember that there’s more love in this world than there is hate, even though some days it may not feel like it and we may have to try extra hard to see it.

Fred Rogers has one of my all-time favorite quotes that I always look to, especially on days like today:

“When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, ‘Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.’”

Which is in a weird way, is a lot like Natalie’s advice, with a few less expletives, because they both are telling us to look for the beauty and love and kindness in the world instead of focusing on fear and hate.

So, as I laid down in final resting pose at the end of class, my mat got wet with more tears, but they weren’t just tears of sadness and fear and anxiety anymore, they were tears of love for the helpers and the givers. The anonymous heroes who are wading through the flooded streets of Puerto Rico and digging through rubble in Mexico. Tears for the people who no doubt saved lives and gave their lives helping shield others in Las Vegas last night. Tears for my friends and family who help me in big and little ways every day, who support me and love me through all of life’s ups and downs. Tears for a fall leaf dancing in the wind. Tears for being alive.

“Sometimes there’s so much beauty in the world, I feel like I can’t take it.”

So today, I’ll take child’s pose when I need it and I’ll cry when I need to. But I’ll try to keep Natalie and Mr. Rogers’ advice in my heart, and focus on the beauty and the kindness of the world, because it’s there, it’s all around us, we just have to remember to see it.

Shanti. Shanti. Shanti.

Namaste.

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